jungle meds

guard the medicine
goes the jungle dream
gates ours to climb

guard the jungle medicine
goes the mothwing song

keepsafe her vinous sleep,
oh medicine man,
goes a third, topless.

none of this was written down.

hardly worth posting

I believe in whole cloth legacy
a rhyme | a dish | a seder

So Winnetka now, private beach
sand sprung lovers or heroes or bodies
a complete fest of divers retraining instinct
instead fusing it with old downhome responsehood
false funeral of something flat, something legendary

there didn't used to be school-shootings
except pick-em-up hot swift kick the library Danny

he's out to lunch

The Makeshift Machines

Maybe I can make this myself.

Nice torch, man. You light

the guy and lantern spray

the most sandstone parts

of our lives, which is to say

we are becoming, & shale

& shake and the first heard/\

Tigers have alumni; originally,

seeds were mammals. Of course

camel fur, camphor frenetic

sheikhs laugh like treats. Hey,

come to my cave. It's cool, don't

worry about it, I have a permit,

my crab's named Hermit, we'll

relax a bit, join me, I'll jangle it.

figurative cloudass

I've never looked at clouds;
they only rainlight me.

Never played the cray-pa, though
I have been rained on.

Why all this talk of slurry?
No. Get warmer, friend.

What reason for our discourse?
"Languid cracked games
spell out our disaster
in the trumpet cabinet,"
is something I would say.

"What part?"

"All of it.
All of it."

But this is just the start.
Then there are chirrupings
I know that's not a word
I DON'T CARE

chirruppings red, green &
yellow shale, every color
of the pickering dickering dock,
the glory-man craveboy in the
cement stacks of the fucking moon,
the moon, boy. The goddam moonman.

we are no less ordinary

it seems that never does the world issue word
like a forest full of cats mid-rebellion
the felines taking revenge on the antihistamine
contingent. ((I am the full great scorpion of old!))

-constant-hordes-and-clouds-of-white-aggression
[meaning whitehot] slag like luncheons visit upon us

) not an occasion
) without somebody’s mention
) forest to the fire
) toes for a burglar

one time I had sex on the kitchen floor of some family in Loveland, Ohio. My girlfriend was house-sitting for them. As I recall I still wasn’t very experienced sexually so it wasn’t as glorious as it could have been.

steamy white rows of
rice (it was rice, it was rice)
like white fluffy life
grain; in silence; some recognition
lighting up the goddam people and taking them
down to the ground to the hermit to the hound
the white-hot red-hot green&sunbeam maniac
wherein we wail at each other like lecticorns
true lambents of the unctuous funeral
hopped up on coals of white-hot peppermint Bluth
canes and wiles and wilds and broken spermicidal
infants in a black soup of majestic mystery
misery

it’s raining please;
we are no less ordinary

nude words

every nude word you ever said
were a drag-done-lady selling veggies
or riding
somebody's spaniel
down the road toward the brick bunting
pigeons retrieving treats amongst the trees
hills, witches, wrens, cat-treats
all these things and more
are dripping like anemones into the sea
you cannot imagine what this really means
to smote the small guy while wading
balls-out in the smooth tan reminder
of a legacy, of a legalization protocol
look onto doom as a sign of doom
or murder as a sign of some murder
like FEMA made into a disaster and ruined
the frail crab bayed-out orchestra of intense fever
consorting our worst intentions at every turn of the wheel
and somebody's cinnamon stick is sticking into their ass
loose, luridly, hooking around a pomegranate piece of pussy
like a meal tattoo gone wild.

"Secretly obsessed with fish..."

she whispered,
like a great white buffalo.
Mark Ruffalo.
Divine is all the time

Raw fishermen
rayfish in their craws
dollards of sand
ocean blue craypas
plantains on the plains

phantom flames
acid-induced trips are lame.
I never claimed to have gone anywhere
though I may have walked at times
I didn't go all that far.

I saw things, but who doesn't?
People blind to what's around them
don't know a red pepper from a green one
or think cabbage and lettuce are the same.
I would recommend not looking at clouds.

This is why I have a lawyer on retainder!!! (LOL)

After playing bongos until I collapsed nude onto my free-trade organic bamboo flooring, and slowly crawling to my computer to check my email, I got an angry epistle from my lawyer Ron regarding a recent Absurdists' post. He ordered me to write this on the blog or face stiff penalties (Absurdists' board of regents is getting very irritated with the lack of production and certainly he knows I don't want to upset them anymore. Normally I'd tell the ginkgo-pooping toolbag to calm down with a nice warm tea of white willow bark and ballsack... but now I've got to play nice). Here goes:

TO: MY BLOGREADING PUBLIC
REGARDING: MY LAST POST
WHEREIN MY WORDS WANT CLARIFICATION
REGARDING SUGGESTIONS OF NEFARIOUS
ACTIVITIES BY TED HAMPTON, Jr., OF
CHAMPAIGN COUNTY, ILLINOIS, SPECIFICALLY
SEEMING TO SUGGEST THAT TED
HAMPTON, Jr., MURDERED BILLY-RAY,
or ANY PERSON, FOR THAT MATTER.

Dear Reader,
How are you? Hope things are excellent. Say, let's cut the crap, okay? I'd like to firmly disavow any suggestion that there is any barber by the name of Ted Hampton. Really, there isn't any man in the world, let alone in Champaign County, named Ted Hampton, Jr., who makes a living cutting hair and hawking grooming products (subtly, on the side). And even if there were, this no-doubt upstanding, patriotic man would never have killed Billy-Ray, or killed anybody, for that matter. 

Why I never cared for Ad Libs

FILL IN THE BLANK

You met your

(a) wife
(b) bank teller
(c) poker partner
(d) dad

after a nice stroll and a lunch of

(a) burgers

from the local firemen union's summer picnic.
Met Paul, married with two kids, and Somerset,
who seemed like kind of an asshole. After that we
jetted and bought some jewelry from a few pirates
on the streetside. We later realize they were just
kids dressed up and that the jewelry was really
old receipts.

Next we met up with our friends Ned and Eileen at
Paramount Filters (where they only serve the finest
filter-feeders!). Turns out Billy-Ray had been murdered.

How did it happen, you ask? It was most certainly
1. The Barber

(a) in the steam room
with the jelly fish

(b) in the bone home
with the pepper-fish

(c) on top the dromedary
meaning it's a camel with one hump

or

(d) Ted Hampton.

You decide.

for better or worse (crayfish version)

I don't get you
she said, livid
with a crayon in her grasp
and an army of mercurial guttersnipes
slashing like land-coves at the bay.

how has it been, imaginary?
i complained, aloud, to the gruff man
eyeing me like starburst by the bay.

listen, crawdaddies, i said,
these aren't your parts. we have
claimed them.

back then

porch by the wetslide grasses,
she purrs, a nude princess
in need of linens or, at least,
some grasses or rush with which
to fashion some clothing.
this came to me in a dream
the night after a barber stole my wife
years later
when i finally realized
we were just kids
back then.

detailed notes on psychic interaction between two consenting adults at the civic center

Is this good or bad? I have a newsie
hovering around the building asking me stupid questions like
do i want to live? would i rather stay in the boardroom? how many people have never pooped? is this possible? where are my shoes?

I don't, I answer. And, yes, probably, how dare you ask that question, no, on your feet.

From Jungle to Businesswoman Shakedown

On the peninsula is where I got the degree. In the vegetative, dank, smelly jungle is where I was born. I come from deep dark earth like shit and I make it to the mainland and I take a job at a smelly laundry store and I work work work the peninsular, mainland way of life. This how I live, okay. So you come here to discuss some business. What can I do to you that you cannot do to me? Easy, give me a blowjob. No, seriously. Right now. Do it.

Insane Tommy

be-wed were the eyes of Mary Todd
be-wed were her pearly gates
be-wed on Wednesday and tell Tommy kimbo;
tell Tommy his Mommy is tall. 

Oh, tell Tommy his Mommy is tall.
Tell Mommy his Tommy is tall.
Tell Mommy on Tommy;
Tell Tommy on Mommy;
Embroider his name in your quilt.

Quotes on the Bloody Danube

"There is a vision greater than my own
(an eye in no way limited like mine)
which puts me in my place."
--Augustus Finch IV, Esq.

"Sparrows have attacked.
Bring the reinforcements."
--Crow

"Specimens. I need Specimens, dammit!
Gregg--get back here with those specimens,
you little fairy! Specimens, Jim, get him!
Get the specimen fairy boy!"
--Steven Crabe

Garlic notes

1. In the cavern of the blog,
things looked untidy.

2. I've skewered shrimp
with less peppers than that, Jesus.

3. The brooding "big cat" biologist thought
How many leopard prints
have my jubilant masters unearthed?

4. Sometimes my dad gets mad at me
for writing bizarre rusticons like this
here -- just look at me, making up
a word again -- Rusty cones, dogs,
wherein the witching is welled
cold hard dark un

5.
man
holding
a lantern
   (already won)
Withholding a
pattern (since begun)!

6.
The piece emerges:
Am I Alive?